Sponsorship

What is Sponsorship?

Sponsorship is a voluntary and purposeful relationship in which one CoDA member agrees to support another member, known as a sponsee, as they explore the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions and apply them in their recovery from codependent behaviours and patterns.

A sponsor usually has personal experience of studying and applying the Steps and shares the experience, strength and hope gained through their own recovery. Sponsorship is more than occasional fellowship or general sharing. Sponsor and sponsee will usually agree to speak or meet regularly, with the purpose of helping the sponsee reflect on the CoDA programme, recognise their own patterns and develop their own relationship with a Higher Power of their understanding.

Sponsorship in CoDA

A sponsor may listen to written Step work, encourage continued attendance at meetings and outreach, and share their own experience of self-care, boundaries and applying CoDA principles in everyday life.

At its best, sponsorship offers trust, acceptance, honesty and steady support. A sponsor listens without judgement and shares rather than advises or directs. They may gently challenge a sponsee to recognise their patterns and remain honest with themselves, but do not criticise, control, rescue or make decisions for them.

Sponsors are CoDA members too, with their own recovery, responsibilities, boundaries and commitments. Many choose to sponsor as a way of giving back what was freely given to them. The relationship may be brief, focused on a particular part of recovery, or become lasting and deeply meaningful.

Sponsorship is not mandatory and is not the only way to explore the Steps.

How to Find a Sponsor

Finding a sponsor can take time, and there is no single correct way to do it.

You may meet potential sponsors by attending CoDA meetings regularly, listening to members share and noticing whose experience and way of relating resonate with you. Some meetings invite members who are available to sponsor to identify themselves.

You can ask someone directly whether they are available to sponsor, or whether they would be willing to have an initial conversation. You may want to ask how they approach sponsorship, how often they usually speak with a sponsee, and what boundaries and expectations they have.

A sponsor does not need to have all the answers. What matters is a willingness to share honestly, listen without judgement, respect boundaries and support another member in taking responsibility for their own recovery.

Not every person you ask will be available, and not every sponsorship relationship will be the right fit. Either person may decide not to continue.

Sponsorship is voluntary. You are free to choose whether to have a sponsor, whom to ask and whether the relationship continues to support your recovery.

Member-led networks are also available to help members:

• share experience, strength and hope about sponsorship
• connect with others interested in working the Steps
• form Step Groups or Sponsored Step Study Groups
• arrange CoDA outreach calls

Ways to be Supported Through the CoDA Twelve Steps

• Find a sponsor
• Attend a sponsor-led Step group
• Attend Step-focused meetings
• Develop a co-sponsoring relationship
• Join or form a Step group, sometimes known as a Po5 group
• Attend a Step study

Getting Started

See the Sponsorship Resources and Literature page for a curated selection of CoDA sponsorship and Step resources.

Studying the Steps and Traditions usually involves reading CoDA literature, reflecting on questions, writing about our own experience, and sharing that work with a sponsor, co-sponsor or Step group.

Working the Steps means putting what we learn into practice in our daily lives: recognising our patterns, taking responsibility for our choices, developing healthier ways of relating, making amends where appropriate and continuing to apply CoDA principles in our lives.

The Traditions are also part of this process. CoDA describes the Steps and Traditions as offering guidance for living and relating with others, and encourages us to apply the awareness gained through Step work in our meetings, service and relationships.

“We study the Steps through reading, reflection, writing and sharing. We work the Steps by applying their principles in our daily lives.“

Anonymous

What does CoDA mean by “recovery”?

CoDA uses the word recovery to describe becoming aware of our codependent patterns, recognising how they affect our lives and relationships, and learning to respond differently using the tools and principles of the programme.

Through the Steps and Traditions, we learn to practise self-care, take responsibility for our own lives and develop healthier and more loving relationships with ourselves and others.

CoDA Steps One, Two, Three

Using CoDA’s 30 Questions

CoDA has produced a Thirty Questions tool to help members begin working Steps One, Two and Three with the support of a sponsor, co-sponsor or Step group.

CoDA Steps Four & Five

Using the CoDA’s 40 Questions

CoDA has also produced a Forty Questions tool to support members through Steps Four and Five with a sponsor, co-sponsor or Step group

Purchase The Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions Workbook of Co-Dependents Anonymous

Purchase the CoDA Blue Book (Co-Dependents Anonymous)

Sponsorship resources on CoDA.org

• CoDA.org – Sponsorship
• CoDA.org – Sponsorship Brochure
• CoDA.org – Resources for Sponsors
• CoDA.org – Working the Steps in a Group (including sample script)

See also

FAQs – Sponsorship
Shared with thanks – Sponsorship
Sponsorship shares
Co Sponsorship shares
Group Sponsorship shares